My therapy fish, Red

I am blessed with some outrageously special friends. One I’ll call JM bought me and himself a fish, named mine “Red,” and kept both at my place. I missed one of JM’s detailed instructions about changing their water, and his fish died. Another friend urged me to get a replacement, and came with me to pick it out. JM again left his new fish at my place. Sometimes JM pops in when I’m out, so one night I asked if he had fed the fish. His relpy:

No. I figured your laziness would just kill your fish so took my buddy to the warehouse… I feel bad for leaving Red there for his possible death sentence but I wanted you to have a friend. If it was a dog or something I’d step in but it’s a $5 fish. Caring for an animal really helps guide your innards away from selfishness and neglectful ways. Which seems to be a pretty prevalent issue with your psychi. I took my dude with me because he looked like if he had a knife and clutches with opposable thumbs would slit his wrists. Remember kids.. It’s down the road, not across the street.

A tiny excerpt from my response:
“… Caring for a pet, caring for my property… If those things conflict with my friends and family, I neglect those things…”

JM’s full reply:

I understand what you said, but because of the hurt that’s inside you I see, maybe someday you’ll get why I got you an animal.

This stuff that’s unresolved that is repeating in your head and to other ppl, support groups internal/external unresolvable crutches are things that actually only you can resolve most times can be talked out best with a goldfish. Like forgiving yourself instead of asking for forgiveness from others around you.

The animals know basic instinct. Which is change. Life and Death. If you’re alive there always will be change. Change always takes time to adjust to, big or small. Death is your final change in this conscious form.

In the end it’s actually you talking to you and they speaking only with basics interprets of their known world. Superior in their own way. Because their interpretations are a manifestation of an answer in its own self as an entity.

If a picture says a thousand words, how many words are in a single action?

Plus.. if you kill someone, you can tell them where you hid the body and get it off your chest. They literally rip each other’s jaws off over [a mate] plus don’t speak English. No judgement there.

I’m caring for Red as lovingly as I can now. Occasionally, I watch him for a bit. Someday, I may speak to him (to myself).

Countless people have done beautiful things for me throughout my life. My life rolls on, changing always in this conscious form, with another beautiful friend I can count on… And then there’s JM, too…


Neil D. 2020-09-28

Published by Neil Durso

Just another mid-lifer sharing the journey...

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