Preface to poem, “Advent Prequel To Footprints”

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AVOIDANT ENERGY NEVER WASTED

Prostitutes, beggars, addicts (the “possessed”), the unclean and depraved, the lowest of the low, and the most shameful were His preferred company. He rebuked others who thought themselves better and less in need, with no radically unmet need(s).

Not only were the lowly most in need, but they were also the best to go forth with the good news and spread it to earth’s ends. They have powerful “street cred,” and authentic, abundant empathy for shame and emptiness.

To set yourself free as newly created takes no effort as enormous as the overwhelming energy of avoidance and denial, hiding and nurturing shame, comparing and pursuing your righteousness versus others.

That battle happens in your ego, where wrestling with the Spirit happens. None of it is even real, objectively outside of you. It is on your inside. You find it by looking within. Interior life. To free yourself from denial and avoidance, ironically, all you must do is stop battling. For control. Simply allow. Permit. Accept. That should be effortless–to stop doing something.

Let yourself be the ultimate *victim* you were created to be.

A victim of an infinitely relentless, perfectly seeing, irresistibly jealous, ultimately inescapable Love. The Son submitted to being a victim so that we can trust His “street cred” when it comes to believing that God understands our suffering as victims. It’s not as if He didn’t suffer!

Enormous effort is not required any longer. You have spent that effort, and it WILL be fulfilled; just perhaps not as you thought. All that remains is effortless acceptance. Accept that the life you have spent in denial and avoidance has been Watched and Known — intimately — all along. You have not — as you might think — suffered alone.

All of that shame, pressure, stress, and unhappiness amounts to immeasurable energy. Has all of that been a waste?

Hell no!

Time to say, “No!” to hell.

If that monumental lifetime investment now feels fruitless, that’s EXACTLY as it is to be. You are EXACTLY where you are ordained to be. All of your painful effort and suffering was SUPPOSED to lead you to this point of insufferable need. Of rockbottom despair. Removing your choice to let go, and forcing you to let go. What force can be greater than a lifetime of fortified ego?

Surrender.

EASY YOKE, LIGHT BURDEN (Mt 11:30)

(continue to “Advent Prequel To Footprints“)

[Neil D. 2019-12-16]

Published by Neil Durso

Just another mid-lifer sharing the journey...

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